Firstly, women require time and money.

Women = Time x Money

As is well known, time is money

Time = Money

Therefore

Women = Money x Money = Money 2

And because money is the root of all evil

Money = root(Evil)

Therefore

Women = ( root(Evil) ) 2

ie. Women = Evil

As you know I’m co-owner of office-humour.co.uk, well in a routine check of search engine placement I checked on Google and office-humour.co.uk is now number 1! Don’t believe me, try it…If you want to advertise of sponsor the site get in touch, we’re currently running at around 4.5 millon hits per month with 1.3 million page views.

TPS RegistrationFound this after seeing something at work about it, it’s the Telephone Preference Service website. Basically, and I quote, “The Telephone Preference Service (TPS) helps you to make sure your telephone number is no longer available to organisations who may telephone you with offers and information you do not wish to receive.”Well worth it if you ask me, stop automated computers ringing you up or people from India who you can’t understand!

OriginalTrilogy.com – Dedicated to the preservation of classic sci-fiAs you may or may not be aware Lucasfilm announced in February that the Star Wars films (the original 3) will be released on DVD, however, they are releasing the Special Editions not the original theatrical cuts of the movies. Go sign the petition to get the originals restored and released in their full glory Use the force.

Ananova – Man’s longstanding condition draws a crowd in hospitalA man has become a tourist attraction in the Dominican Republic after admitting himself to hospital with an erection that had lasted six days.Staff at Jose Maria Cabral and Baez hospital in Villa Gonzalez said nurses, doctors and members of the public had turned up to glimpse his predicament for themselves.Terra reports that unfortunate Igancio Cabrera, 25, was told by doctors that urgent surgery was required because untreated the condition could have left him impotent.The hospital’s director told the paper that since Mr Cabrera denied taking sexual stimulants, he could be suffering from a rare form of anaemia that can give men erections for long periods of time.

Possibly one of the worst films ever. It’s shocking bad, though it is amusing but in a so bad it’s amusing style. Written, directed, produced and starred in by Ben Stiller I feel he should keep to the acting. Hoping Starsky and Hutch this weekend is going to be better!

The 2004 Budget has not lived up to the impact many observers thought it might. IR35 remains with us, IR591 is not nearly as bad as we feared, and most others taxes have been frozen.The highlights as they affect contractors are:

• As of 1st April 2004 any Company earning less than 10,000 pa and distributing that income as dividends will lose the 0% Corporation tax rate, and pay 19% instead.

  So, what does this mean for contractors?

  If you Company profit is 10,000 or less, and you take the whole amount as dividends you will be 1900 a year worse off. Between 10000 and 50000, again assuming the whole amount is distributed as dividends you will be worse off on a roughly sliding scale by 1900 at 10,000 profits and no worse off at all at the 50,000 threshold.

  Profits over 50,000, or cash not taken as a dividend is absolutely unaffected.Coupled with the recent benefits of the VAT flat rate scheme we believe that most contractors will on the whole be no worse off.

• The Government is introducing a new disclosure measure to counter largescale avoidance of direct taxes. This will require those who devise and market certain avoidance schemes to provide the Inland Revenue with details of these schemes. This will hit ALL IR35 avoidance schemes, therefore even more care should be taken if thinking about one of these.
• The 100% First Year Allowance for equipment purchased is reduced to 50%. This means that instead of getting tax relief for the whole cost of asset purchase in year one, it is spread over two years.
• IR35 will remain, however the Government proposes to consider the issues raised by the interaction with the tax system of definitions of income of self-employment, and the remuneration paid to owner-managers, in a discussion paper which will be issued at the time of the 2004 Pre-Budget Report.

The Dreamweaver MX 2004 and Dreamweaver MX 2004 Update 7.0.1 has now been released. Amungst the big things fixed, performance issues, stability, timelines function, ColdFusion reference help (yay!) and more. Full Release Notes are also available.

Well, not sure what to say to this, yes we lost (19-13) and I suppose the better team won. We didn’t play well at all, though I hope they get an ear bashing and beat the Welsh or we’ll never live it down… Come on boys!!!

An interesting article over at The Register, titled “Inside the mind of the gay sheep”. I don’t think I need to say anymore really.